1. Sending a boy outside to eat with the dog when they repeatedly burp at the dinner table does not cure belching. It encourages it.
2. All bodily functions are hysterical.
3. You can clip a Lightsaber to a diaper. Actually, you can clip FOUR Lightsabers to a diaper.
4. A boys' ability to hear is directionaly proportional to what they are being told. But maybe that's not just a "boy" thing....
5. Trucks, I knew about... airplanes, guns, superheros, forts, tanks, guns, spit, knives, farts... I had NO idea about.
6. When told to sit still, a boy will actually vibrate.
7. If you want a toilet flushed, you'll have to flush it yourself.
8. "Vomit face toe curd earwax breath" is a compliment.
9. There are 742 ways to sit on a couch.
And the most surprising thing I've found about raising boys, is that
10. I prefer camping trips and shoot em up movies to exotic vacations and chick flicks and a bouquet of dandelions clutched in a dirty fist is more precious than a dozen long stemmed roses.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Monday, February 2, 2009
Products Mommies REALLY Want
Diapers
I recognize that in the world of excrement control, diapers have come a long way from the dripping cotton cloths and pins of yore. Today’s diapers are trim, fit, have gathered legs and boast of their flexibility and capability to move with your growing child.
That’s all good and well, but let’s think about what us mommies REALLY want. Is it the ability for our crawling babies to be able to move more freely and unencumbered towards our collection of Waterford Crystal? Or would we rather the diaper be able to handle the thrice soiled nighttime waste without providing ‘finger-painting’ entertainment the next morning?
Don’t get me wrong, I do care about the comfort of my child, but if I have to chose between a diaper that will handle the fact that my 2 year old climbed on the counter and ate a 3lbs Costco container of grapes, or one that will ‘move and flex with my toddler’, then I’d rather have the diaper that keeps my son stranded on his back like a displaced turtle as opposed to running for my carpet cleaner that can handle ‘pet stains’.
How many companies out there are brave enough to market what we really want but are too embarrassed to admit it?
“NEW Industrial Strength Diapers! Made with 47 layers of thick cotton batting, three layers of extra tight elastic bands and a stay-wet inner layer so your baby feels soggy and uncomfortable each time they go to speed up the process of potty training!”
Now that is a product us mommies could REALLY use.
I recognize that in the world of excrement control, diapers have come a long way from the dripping cotton cloths and pins of yore. Today’s diapers are trim, fit, have gathered legs and boast of their flexibility and capability to move with your growing child.
That’s all good and well, but let’s think about what us mommies REALLY want. Is it the ability for our crawling babies to be able to move more freely and unencumbered towards our collection of Waterford Crystal? Or would we rather the diaper be able to handle the thrice soiled nighttime waste without providing ‘finger-painting’ entertainment the next morning?
Don’t get me wrong, I do care about the comfort of my child, but if I have to chose between a diaper that will handle the fact that my 2 year old climbed on the counter and ate a 3lbs Costco container of grapes, or one that will ‘move and flex with my toddler’, then I’d rather have the diaper that keeps my son stranded on his back like a displaced turtle as opposed to running for my carpet cleaner that can handle ‘pet stains’.
How many companies out there are brave enough to market what we really want but are too embarrassed to admit it?
“NEW Industrial Strength Diapers! Made with 47 layers of thick cotton batting, three layers of extra tight elastic bands and a stay-wet inner layer so your baby feels soggy and uncomfortable each time they go to speed up the process of potty training!”
Now that is a product us mommies could REALLY use.
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