Products We Mommies Really Want

Vomit Alarm

In case there is anyone out there in that great void of blogland that works in the Product Development Industry, I thought I would give you a budge towards some products that us mommies REALLY want.
I will begin with a product that I could have used this morning for example. A Vomit Alarm.
Too many times have I lain an ailing child on the couch with a pillow, blanket and bowl and their list of instructions: “If you feel like you need to throw up, run like hell to the bathroom and do it in the toilet. If someone is on said toilet, grab them and throw them to the floor. If you feel like you may not make it to the bathroom, then USE THIS BOWL! You are washable, my couch and carpet are not. Do you understand these rules as I have stated them to you?” A feeble ‘yes’ is the usual reply, otherwise a weak nod of the head. After signing an affidavit, the ailing child is left to rest.
It is then a mystery to me how this same child, given all the tools and instructions necessary for the proper removal of one’s stomach contents, can then proceed to lean over the couch and heave all over the carpet while holding the bowl aloft in the other hand.
As many of us mommies have more than one child and cannot umpire with a bowl waiting for the pitch, a Vomit Alarm would certainly come in handy. I’ve attempted to set up a human alarm in the form of a sibling to come screaming when heaving begins, but they are usually more interested in watching the process and giving the standard “Ewww, gross!” to come and get me.
I’m not asking for anything elaborate, just a device that can measure the heave factor and give out the standard warning. A soothing female voice that will warn me as to when it is a false alarm (“Dry heaves commencing, comfort needed”) or when the stomach is in fact getting ready to empty it’s contents (“Regurgitation imminent, bring reinforcements”).
No more streaking through the house throwing children and chairs aside at the sound of a cough, no more washing sheets and showering children at 2am and no more wailing from a brother who had the misfortune of being in the lower bunk when the ailing child up top turned towards the wall instead of the bowl. Ah, the bliss of a vomit free environment.

Please stay tuned for more Products Mommies REALLY Want in future blogs.